Focusing on what you want in life, instead of what you don’t, changes how you experience your time on this earth in a profound way. This type of belief system helps to set your mind at ease when it begins to create “stories” (usually, the unwanted stories we tell ourselves). Focusing on what you do want is also something I share with my students. What’s the reason for this? We’ll get there in a moment …
Did you know it’s OK if you aren’t on top of things all the time? Did you know it’s OK if you aren’t on top of things half of the time? Did you know that during certain times in life, it’s OK if you aren’t on top of anything? Yeah, it’s really OK!
You’ve got to take care of yourself. You’ve got to break the resistance in your mind. Let me explain that …
A resistant mind is one that goes something like this:
“I want to go to the gym today” …
“Actually, I don’t want to go to the gym today, but I should go to the gym today”…
“I hate the gym, and I’m too tired to go”…
…30 minutes later…
“Well, I guess I’m going to force myself to go to the gym.”
We create a state of resistance for things in our mind all day long. If you’re not sure what counts as a resistant thought, here are some key words which are generally associated with a resistant thought:
- “Should not”
- This “sucks”
- I’m “bored”
If you have more keywords for resistant thoughts you can share them in the comment section located at the bottom of this post.
All of these resistant thoughts attract the very thing we do not want. It would be much nicer to figure out what you do want, and focus on that. The more you believe in what you want the more likely it is to come true. I hear a lot about the “law of attraction”, but my personal belief is that you can’t force yourself to attract anything which you don’t believe is possible. It’s a great idea to start simple by focusing on something you believe can happen. For instance, if you keep focusing on how much you hate the gym, and that you don’t want to go, then you are likely to place yourself in a state of resistance, and low and behold, have a terrible time at the gym. Maybe the air conditioning is broken there, the machines you want to use aren’t available, the guy you hate to run in to makes conversation, and you lose your keys. It all seems like it’s the gyms fault …that stupid place.
If instead you rethink your idea of what the gym means to you, you will start to have experiences you enjoy. When you are “in-joy” you release resistance. Here is one way to rethink things….
Think the thought out loud or in your mind that you would feel empowering to you. What about exercise brings you joy?, what are you really after by exercising? It will be the aspect that adds joy to your life. Begin to think of what joy and empowerment look like to you, and then ask that this become a part of your exercise experience.
By breaking the resistance and aligning with something you do like, little miracles can happen. For instance, a new class may open up which you end up loving! Or maybe you get to speak with someone who becomes a new workout partner and you realize you enjoy having a workout buddy. Suddenly, the entire experience changes because you’ve dropped the resistance toward it. Maybe you stop going to the gym altogether because you realize you like to exercise at home or outdoors. We attract the thoughts we project, and resistant thoughts attract the experience we don’t want to have. Instead start with a belief that seems possible. The universe will take care of how it will happen, you just need to focus on a thought that feels good to you because you believe it can happen.
Using exercise was just one common example I often hear about, and have found that I exercise best when I am among nature, outside, in a park, or some wooded area. That is my personal joy, and you’ll need to find yours. Remember, you can be resistant to anything. However, you can also rethink your outlook with anything by deciding on what you do want, and finding a thought which is believable enough to become your reality, it will always be the thought that brings joy and stems from a place of love, not force. If you don’t have a specific thought, focus on love. When love is focused on, it always creates a situation capable of creating the greatest outcome possible.